What strategies do you use to maintain your health and well-being?
Although I have runner in my name I think of walking as my strategy for health and wellbeing. I love running and it makes me feel good but walking is my go-to when I need to “air out”.
I walk or run every morning then walk at lunch and after work. When we were first sent to wfh in 2020 I wasn’t walking in the morning. I realized that I was off and cranky. I started my morning “commute” with a walk. It is a reset to start the day.
I love walking when I travel, going into little neighborhoods and exploring.
I advise everyone to walk everyday. You don’t have to run, just the simple act of walking does wonders for mind, body, and soul.
We would have masses in people’s homes, bringing in a local priest. Seems weird, maybe it was. I remember my brother and I did readings (my sister was still in Colombia). I couldn’t pronounce “Ecclesiastes” and just looked at the priest like “Dude, you have to help a girl out”.
July 18
7th grade: We took off to [new state]. I’m going to miss [old city]
A rare 7th grade, going into 8th grade entry. Moving to a new state, a year after losing my dad, is a tough transition. I need to write more on this and talk about this, though I have made mention of it. I was hopeful at this time, which makes me happy to think about.
My family had made this trek before, back and forth. It was different this time as it was final. My brother had left earlier so he could work. My sister left a boyfriend behind and was upset, she was starting her junior year of high school at a new school. Changing schools is not the end of the world, but like experiencing grief at a young age it has an impact. I don’t have memories of childhood where I am now, my friends don’t know what I know from my old state. On the plus side I feel like I knew state geography better.
July 22
10th grade: Nana died, 67, she had been really sick.
67! To a teenager that is old. She also looked old, people did back then. Now I think how young that was. My grandmother, my dad’s mom, was a wonderful woman. She worked in the hospital where I was born and visited me right away. As I kid I told the story that my nana took my mom out to lunch right after she gave birth to me! Not quite. My grandmother was smart and funny, more than she was given credit for. She loved crossword puzzles and crocheting. I still have a blank she made. She was the only grandmother that I had as my other one died before I was born. When I think of grandmothers I think of her love. She set the bar. Also, I think the name “Nana” as opposed to “Gram” or “Grandma” is heartwarming. Just me. It had to have been hard on her to have outlived her son, I am sure that contributed to her (and eventually my grandfather’s) early death.
A little heavy but not bad. Hug your nana, grandma, Grammy or whoever makes your heart happy.
6th grade: Dad died at the age of 41 of a heart attack.
So I can write a lot or I can write nothing; it doesn’t change anything and it still has an impact. I have written and talked about this a lot, ironically more so as I get older and realize just the impact this had on me and the way I live my life. IYKYK
My life changed after this. Of course it did. I went from two loving parents to one. Money was tighter. I learned about grief. I watch my mom crumble yet keep her shit together in a way I will never forget. I got mad when I saw men older, heavier, less fit than my dad and wondered how they could still be alive if my dad wasn’t.
What I didn’t know at the time was how much this changed my life. I often say that I got a slap of reality at a young age. I knew that people died young. Bad things happen to good people. I learned of disappointment; my family was going through an exciting change when this happened. I still have a hard time anticipating that good things will happen to me. Not pessimism but more not wanting to get hurt or disappointed again. Therefore I build up walls. I have worked on this for years; some progress and a lot more to go. I’ve learned to accept some of who I am and what holds me back.
What I have also learned is empathy. Sometimes just being there and listening is enough. Listening without judgement, listening without advice. The walls and the empathy were part of me before my dad died, the trauma enhanced them.
What I did not understand as a child was that my dad was a person, not just a dad. His death was tough on his friends, family, co-workers. I couldn’t comprehend other adults, besides his immediate family, grieving. I figured they forgot about him after a while. It wasn’t until years later when I lost a family friend that I got it.
I couldn’t write this entry yesterday because I wanted to deal with the day differently. It hit harder this year. Some years I barely remember and some hit hard. Since it was on a weekend day this year it was harder because I was home and thought about it. Other life events will also shape my feelings.
I got my sense of humor from my dad. Actually, I have always told “dad jokes”. There are still times today when I will laugh at something and think of my dad.
It hurts because there was so much love.
Btw, this happened the summer after 6th grade. I started 7th grade, middle school, at a new school with this heavy burden on my little shoulders. Something else that few people understand.
8th grade: Two Years! Wow! I really miss dad. Not a bad day.
Oh kiddo, you make me cry. I always say that I want to go back and hug my little 11 year-old self but this 13 year-old wisdom needs a big hug.
8th grade: Me, [cousins] stayed up all night.I smoked a cigarette for the 1st time. I hated it
We stayed up all night and paid the price the next day as we had to participate in a parade the next day. We joke about it today.
I do remember trying cigarettes again, same place, a few summers later. Fortunately I did not like them though menthol was better. I understand how they can be addictive. I’m too damn cheap to smoke now.
July 4
8th: The Parade. It was o.k. I got burnt
Neighborhood parade that was started by my uncles and his friends when we were kids and still goes on today. It is a nice tradition and the teenagers today roll their eyes at it. Patriotism, not politics, was a big part of my family. I’m proud to be an American; the good, bad and ugly.
So after not sleeping all night we went to the beach and slept. Yup, we got burnt- if memory serves me right I was sleeping on my side and got a burn on one side of my face. Someone nicely covered my body with a blanket.
I proudly slather myself with sunscreen now and check for moles. With age comes wisdom.
July 6
8th: I came home from the cape
When I was younger I would spend a couple of weeks there. I was just there this weekend and the memories I have there are wonderful. I feel blessed to have been able to spend time there and be surrounded by amazing people, some of whom I still see now. We try to pass on the love and fun to the next generation.
July 7
8th: We might buy a house
Such a stressful time for my mom to house hunt in an expensive area. We looked at a lot of places during this time.
July 8
8th: We didn’t get the house.
Bummer. I don’t recall what house it was. We ended up staying in our apartment for another year.
I wonder if it was boredom or something else that made me write every day at this time. Not a ton of information but it sparked memories for me.
It’ll be a while, hopefully I can get to part time work at some point. I want to have free time to work around the house, volunteer and travel. I’m lucky to at least work hybrid so I’m home to do house stuff before and after work (even sneaking in a few minutes for laundry or pulling weeds.
I hope to reduce hours when I’m still active and healthy and can do projects. I also look forward to spending more time with family and friends.
8th grade: Last day of school. I’m gonna miss [middle school]
I guess we got out before I could learn “going to”. That really warms my heart that I felt this way. Someone told me that we sometimes dwell on the anticipation of things rather than the reality of it. I think I recall the bad days and forget that good was there.
June 21
8th: I got my braces off. My teeth look good.
Oh what a beautiful feeling. My teeth were silky. I only had braces for about 9 months but I despised them, my gums and cheeks were always getting cut. I was a smiling goddess after
June 23
8th: [sister] left for Colombia, I’m gonna miss her
Yeah, she went to South America for her foreign exchange program. She loved it. Such a sweet sentiment and it brings tears to my eyes now.
June 24
8th: I moved into [sister’s] room.
Ah, that’s a true little sister moment. She’s gone and I will take her stuff. I think she had an a/c unit in her room so that made sense. It just looked funny next to the previous day’s entry.
June 26
7th grade: I got my first period at 6:00 pm.
Ah, womanhood! A big milestone in a girl’s life. I hated it. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to ride my bike anymore (those pads were clunky). I thought that I would just always have it; I knew that it came each month but I figured my life was changing. It can be tough because you are no longer a kid in a sense. No fanfare, my mom just went to the store to get supplies since my she and my sister wore tampons. I’m glad that I wrote about it though. As I write this today it is my anniversary.
June 29
8th grade: I went down the cape, I saw St Elmo’s Fire it was great.
A bit young for that movie but we would buy tickets for another movie then go into the R-rated movie and ask a young couple if they would say we are with them if asked. Rarely ever questioned, it was a different time.
Oh how I wanted to be in that group, just not Demi Moore’s character. I was naive enough to think that is what life is like after college. Rob Lowe was the perfect bad boy. Such a great movie and reminds me that I need to see the documentary about the brat pack.
June 30
8th grade: I really like [family friend] he reminds me of [old neighbor]
Okay, this one was weird and embarrassing. Yet sweet. The friend was about 10 or so years older. I think that there is something about young teen girls liking men in their 20s (see prior day). I mean we drooled over Duran Duran and George Michael. I think that there is a maturity that they had and they appeared to have their stuff together. Once I got into my 20s I knew the difference.
Halfway done with the year. I continue to say how wonderful and cathartic this is to go through and comment on my little life. Even the cringe-worthy crushes.
I was listening to Matthew Perry narrate his book and he mentioned that he almost called it “Unaccompanied Minor” because he would fly solo as a kid between parents.
I too flew solo a couple of times as a child, though for different reasons. My family lived in a different state from extended family. We would often drive out to see them in the summer. One year our parents bought us kids one way tickets and we stayed longer and flew home as unaccompanied minors. At that time non-passengers could go to the gate so my aunts and cousins waited with until we boarded the plane. That year we had to change planes in order to get home where our parents were waiting at the gate upon arrival.
The following year my older siblings had other plans and I was the only one who stayed longer. I flew home by myself. I was 10. 10! I looked much younger than 10 too. I was seated between two adults who ended up chatting to each other. The man in the window seat changed with me so I could look out the window and he could chat with the woman. In my mind they formed a romance and are still together today, thanks to me!
The next year my family didn’t drive out but I still wanted to go so my parents sent me on my way. There were 2 others girls around my age traveling alone, why they didn’t sit us together is beyond me. I recall having a tag on me that said “Unaccompanied Minor” but I could be making that up. I do recall wearing my hot pink ruffle miniskirt with my pink polka dot shirt. Oh I was the shit. We got to our destination and a flight attendant walked the 3 of us to the gate. The other 2 girls had family waiting for them, I did not. If you didn’t figure out from the non-passengers at the gate and my hot pink outfit, this was before cell phones. My aunt was paged throughout the airport, I was afraid that the airline would leave me there. Eventually I see my cousins running towards me; my aunt hit traffic and was late. All good.
My flight home from that trip I was accompanied by my aunts and grandfather, but that’s a story for another day.
A few years later, when I was 15, I visited my sister in college. I took the plane then hopped on the bus to where her college was. Apparently I was too old to be an unaccompanied minor though I probably looked 12. There was a snafu with the bus and I was at one station and my sister was at another. I called her dorm and let her roommate know. About an hour later my sister was there. One of the bus rides I had a creepy guy offer me carrots, I think that I startled him since I was in front of him but so short that I couldn’t be seen from behind.
My family jokes about me traveling by myself at such a young age. There is something that children who traveled as unaccompanied minors experienced that is unique. We were independent, we were trustworthy, we got to do adult things. It makes for funny stories to talk about hopping on a plane as a little 10 year-old. Especially today with so much parental control. We made it out okay I guess.
Thank you to Matthew Perry for this wonderful memory. RIP
If you were forced to wear one outfit over and over again, what would it be?
So I’m going comfortable.
A few years ago I was in a local play, playing a female carpenter. I went to the thrift store and found a pair of men’s cargo pants. I was shocked they fit as I am a short female. I paired them with a t-shirt I had and a boy’s zip-up hoodie (one of the benefits of being short in fitting into kids’ sweat. Not glamorous, at all.
I loved the pants, there were so many pockets and they were so comfortable. They did have an odd fit but I loved wearing that costume, especially because I had to sit backstage for a while before I went on.
I was told before to buy or borrow clothes for a play and never plan on wearing them again because you will be so sick of wearing them after the shows. That rang true as I sadly donated the clothes but every so often I think of those comfy pants with all the pockets. (I just commented on someone else’s comment about a dress with pockets. Women want pockets)
I love to dress pretty and feminine but sometimes I just want to be comfy and not care how I look.
I have been lucky to have visited a few countries but on my bucket list is Italy. I have heard how beautiful it is and the food is amazing. I love that everyone walks everywhere, and comfy shoes are mandatory on the old cobblestones.
I hope to get there in the next few years, I seem to miss the opportunities that come up so I may need to make my own plans but I will get there one day.
After that I would like to visit a Scandinavian country, this is an area where I have not been and I hear wonderful things about it.
8th Grade: Tonight was the 8th grade dance it was a blast. Everyone look nice
Oh, I’m glad that I enjoyed it. I didn’t have a lot of friends but I loved a dance I guess. I wore a dress of my cousin’s, it was very plain. My mom dropped me off and I think she was glad that I went. I often think of those times as tough but maybe they were good some days.
June 15
We had a going away – surprise party for [sister]! She was surprised
My family was big into surprise parties. My sister was doing an exchange program for the summer and my family had a big party with questionably-appropriate cultural items from the country she was visiting. (More to come on that).
Introverted runner and other stuff 